Kit Knightly – Off-Guardian March 31, 2026

Last week, I was reading the latest module of the UK’s Covid Inquiry while working on our most recent Covid Factcheck, and I came across this paragraph…

From 24 June 2020, hospitals in England were required to undertake testing of asymptomatic patients upon admission and subsequently

During the “pandemic”, hospitals were testing all patients for Covid – symptoms or no – multiple times.

I found myself wondering if people really see how directives like this one were used to build a pandemic from nothing at all.

With reports of a “new variant” tearing across the United States, I thought now would be a good time to remind people how exactly “Covid” tests worked and what they were for.

Not in the biochemical way. We’re not talking RNA here, we’re talking about psycho-social manipulation: How test protocols can be used to create the impression of a pandemic that doesn’t actually exist.

So, to help people understand – and help those who already understand explain it to others – I wanted to remove all talk of PCR tests and lateral flows and viruses and Covid itself.

Because we’re talking about general mechanics rather than specifics, practical steps which exist outside of nomenclature and, indeed, can be camouflaged by same.

So…

Let’s imagine you’re trying to convince people of the existence of a deadly new disease.

Your major obstacle is that this disease does not exist. And, as such, you know it’s not going to make anybody ill and it’s not going to kill anyone.

But the good news is that every year tens of millions of people do get ill, and millions of those people do die.

Death and disease already exist, so to create the impression your fictional disease also exists all you need is a mechanism that links it to these pre-existing realities.

This mechanism is a “test”.

Your test needs to a follow a simple principle: it needs to reliably return results that can be interpreted as “positive” and “negative”.

Ideally, this process can be draped in scientific terminology that blinds people to how it operates. Still, for the sake of illustration, we’re going to use something simple: Rolling a traditional six-sided die.

To begin with, we will assign a roll of 1 as “positive” (sick), and a roll of 2, 3, 4, 5 or 6 as “negative” (well).

This test is perfect because no matter who takes it, when, or how, it will always produce some “positive” results. It literally can’t do anything else.

Your next job is to connect these results to pre-existing illness, and thus convince everyone that your imaginary disease a) exists, and b) is killing people.

This necessitates two countable metrics:

1. Cases: People who become “infected” with the “disease” and recover.
2. Deaths: People who become “infected” with the “disease” and die.

Because you know your test will always produce positive results at a given rate, these metrics can be entirely controlled by your implementation of “testing protocols”.

Who you test, where and how often.

You can manipulate the figures further by introducing the concepts of “asymptomatic cases” and, more importantly, “false negative” results.

These concepts can be built into your testing protocols seamlessly, and create an unfalsifiable “pandemic” within weeks of implementation.

Firstly, to create “cases”:

1. Distribute “tests” widely to the civilian population. Encourage their regular use.
2. Everyone who rolls a 1 is “infected” and becomes a “case”.
3. If a “case” displays no symptoms of illness they are an “asymptomatic case”.
4. If a person WITH symptoms of illness rolls anything other than a 1, they have a “false negative” result, they must roll again until they roll a 1.
5. If a “case” repeats the “test” at a later date and gets anything other than 1, they have “recovered”.
6. If a “recovered case” then rolls a 1 again, they are a new “case”.

There, your protocols have now made it so everyone in the wider population with generic symptoms of endemic disease, and millions of people with no symptoms at all, is infected with a disease that is nothing but rolling a 1 on a die.

You have even made it possible for one person to become multiple “cases”.

Now, for deaths the rules are actually simpler:

1. Apply your “test” to everyone admitted to hospital, whether they have symptoms  of your made up disease or not.
2. If they roll a 1 they are “infected”, never test them again.
3. If they roll anything other than a 1, test them again the next day or even multiple times per day if necessary. The sicker the patient is, the more often you test them.
4. Define a death from your imaginary disease as “death from any cause after rolling a one”.

Since, by this method, almost everyone in hospital will eventually roll a 1 and become “infected”, and since a great many people admitted to hospital die, you have just ensured your fictitious disease is going to be listed as the cause of death for hundreds of thousands of people who were almost certainly going to die anyway.

Do you see how low effort this method is?

Millions of people who experience either no symptoms at all, or totally routine symptoms they have experienced dozens of times before, will swear to anyone and everyone they were infected with a disease that never existed.

Millions of families who lost someone they know had cancer or Alzheimer’s or heart disease will swear their loved one died of your disease, because it says so on the death certificate.

You have created a pandemic, where only ordinary levels of disease and death ever existed, entirely through a rigged test which altered people’s perceptions.

Now, in relating this back to Covid, I know some will say “but PCRs and lateral flows are not the same as rolling a dice!”, but I would answer: “Aren’t they?”

The comparison to rolling a dice was first made by Catte back in 2021 and it remains perfectly apt. Consider that “testing positive” for “Covid” did not correlate with death or even symptoms.

Do you remember “breathrough cases”? All those people testing positive despite being vaccinated?

Do you remember that vaccinated people were discouraged from testing themselves?

Do you remember that asymptomatic testing was halted after the vaccine roll-out?

Do you remember the goat, the papaya and the engine oil all testing positive?

Do you know why?

Catte does:

“Because the tests don’t work.”

Or rather, they didn’t work the way everyone said they did. They were just a mechanism for producing a result, and that mechanism worked the same if you were sick or well, living or dying, vaxxed or unvaxxed, left-handed or right. A person, a goat, or a piece of fruit.

Just like rolling a dice.

“Covid” involved far more than just testing in the creation of it’s holographic projection of a pandemic, but those tests and concomitant protocols were the backbone of it, and people need to understand how they worked to make something out of nothing.

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