Irish Savant – irishsavant.blogspot.com June 20, 2019
Obviously there’s no shortage of black pills but today I bring to your attention several reasons to be cheerful. First up is the ongoing swarm of mini quakes in Southern California. Now don’t get your hopes up prematurely. Such swarms do not, sadly, mean the imminent disappearance of Hollywood and Silicon Valley and the rest of Globohomo land into a watery Pacific grave. Nonetheless scientists claim that those quakes could set off a domino effect which would ‘awaken the southern San Andreas from its long slumber’. That fault is capable of producing a quake close to 9 on the Richter Scale. And that would do just fine.
And while we’re on the subject of Hollywood it gladdens the heart to learn that their “comedies” are tanking. The Hollywood Reporter (which is the latest outlet to discontinue reader comments) laments comedy and romantic comedy ticket sales as a whole have been on a steady slide for the past decade. “Ten years ago, comedy was king at the movie theater, and now comedy is having a terrible time getting traction”. Whatever the cause, there’s a cascading list of comedies that have disappointed at the box office over the past few years, leading to a new calculus in the film industry: Which movie justifies a theatrical release and which should be relegated straight to streaming.
The HR agonises long and hard about the causes of this disaster without even coming close to discovering the blindingly obvious: The ‘comedies’ are just not funny. And they’re not funny largely because they’re hamstrung by the PC thought police breathing down the writers’ necks and the force-fitting of unfunny minorities and women (who make lousy comedians) into the starring roles. And maybe straight White males, who make up a huge proportion of the market, have gotten fed up with being the butt of every joke and put-down from minority stooges who have gone beyond the subliminal and now openly display their hate and contempt. The targets seem to have taken the hint and are now staying at home in ever-increasing numbers.
And finally to arch-demon Angela Merkel. Did you see her doing the Hippy Hippy Shake as she stood to her country’s, sorry, Germany’s National Anthem? Enjoy. The official Fake News explanation attributes the attack to dehydration. Silly lie because dehydration does not induce these symptoms. So what was it? The optimist in me says it’s an indication of an advanced neurological disorder that will soon send her to meet her Satanic Master. There are other possibilities of course. It might be an allergic reaction to the German National Anthem. Or the demon within her was trying unsuccessfully to escape. Did she get a sudden vision of Judgement Day, or did someone accidentally sprinkle her with Holy Water? Or, more whimsically, was she bursting for a piss or did she accidentally activate her vibrator? Let’s be positive and go with the fatal neurological disorder.
So there you go. Hopefully your spirits have been raised and there’s a spring in your step as you face another day.