Voice of the White House January 12, 2005

“Several interesting items, one only amusing and the other serious. The Bush people have received so many very serious death threats aimed at Our Beloved Leader that they might as well put a dummy in the Presidential limo on inauguration day. No one will talk about the volume and apparent seriousness of these ongoing threats and neither will they talk about the ACTUAL DEATH TOLLS IN IRAQ! You have been posting only the official figures which are not accurate. These OFFICIAL figures indicate about 1,400 are dead and perhaps 4,000 wounded. Actually, and I have seen the figures from the Pentagon, over 8,000 are dead and over 15,000 are wounded, some maimed for life…blind, missing legs and arms or with the prospect of spending the rest of their young lives confined to a wheelchair in a Vets hospital with a permanent piss bag tied to a leg.

This is the greatest secret and holds the greatest fear for the Bush people. If the public ever finds out the truth, they will lynch him and his fascist co-workers in about ten minutes. Already, parents are wondering why their son’s name is not on official lists and this number is growing every day. This is the real reason why Bush forbade any pictures being taken of arriving caskets at Dover. All even an idiot would have to do would be to count the daily supermarket checkout and the rat would be out of the bag. This nasty business has real legs and even the dullard Bush is terrified.

Rigid censorship has been clamped down by the Pentagon on any information and especially the following truly horrible news: The Arabs have captured a number of GIs and have tortured them terribly before chopping of their heads which they defile by dumping into a well-used latrine. Their statements are that since the US under Bush has ignored the Geneva Treaty and tortured prisoners of war and executed a number of them plus God knows how many unarmed civilians, they will kill every GI they capture. Beheaded and terribly mutilated bodies are quickly grabbed by special teams of GI undertakers, hidden away and sent home in sealed caskets or cremated in a large oven in downtown Baghdad. (Shade of Auschwitz!)

This is one of the reasons why there are so many suicides and so many desertions among the terrified troops. This really awful business is a top priority secret but I will make the shits happy by letting it out and if I can get the actual figures, I will give them to you, names and all, to post alongside the official lies. Why don’t you ask survivors to send you the names of their lost sons and husbands and then check them against the Pentagon Lie List? Better, publish the entire roster of Official Dead and ask anyone whose relatives, sons or husbands are not on it to contact you. You are in the position of doing all of us a great favor if you do.”

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